I don’t care if Michelle Obama *IS* the first lady

She’s not the first lady to ever have bangs and Goddammit,

If people don’t stop saying “Oh, look at you and your Michelle Obama bangs”

I’m gonna punch somebody in the junk. Hard. TWICE.

EFF YOUR I…. I had bangs previously, and they were just bangs.

NOW, they are FLOTUS bangs, and no. They are not.

They’re just damn bangs, and I wish everybody would stop.

Because the next person that says that is going to get the whole

“OH, ARE YOU SAYING THAT BECAUSE WE ARE BOTH BLACK AND HAVE BANGS?”

And that’s going to be awkward. For them.

Because that will certainly be my intention.

Sidenote: I’m sure the FLOTUS is a nice lady, and yeah, her hair looks nice. But what if I HATED her? What if that was the equivalent of calling me a dirty rotten whore? (Don’t be that person that assumes that all black people must love Michelle Obama. I mean, I MIGHT like her, but I may also think she’s an asshole. It’s entirely possible, guys.)

But maybe consider that  it has NOTHING AT ALL to do with famous person currently associated with that hairstyle. My cousin (of the same name) ALSO has this hairstyle. Maybe that’s why I did it. OR MAYBE I JUST WANTED BANGS.