Category Archives: Fun with Facebook

Because I’m the most helpful person ever

Posted on by B

My cousin in 23 years old.

And she’s never been to Vegas. (I know. It’s hard to believe we’re related)

Actually, the funny thing is that of my younger cousins, she is the MOST LIKE ME. 

Anyways. She IMs me on Facebook. I know. A lot of my cousins IM me on Facebook. Which I find to be weird. But what are you gonna do? Family.

She tells me that she wants to go to Vegas for her birthday. In JANUARY. I think her exact words were ” Be there, or never be spoken to again…or something” So, uh…yeah. TWIST MY ARM, I’ll be there. And then I say, “Hey, me and your cousins will be there in April, B2V is coming. Blah blah blah…. they’ll be running/volunteering; I’ll be drinking on the sidelines… blah blah blah….And the weather is perfect…blah blah…. Ditch Fridays at the Palms”

And then after she grilled me about Ditch Fridays, she said that she was scrapping Vegas in January plans. 

Me: Well, you can always have a HALF birthday. JUST SAYING.

So in case you were ever wondering, I AM sorta helpful. Depending on what you want help with.

 

Who you callin’ a ….?

Posted on by B

 

It’s been (passively agressively) called to my attention that I’m a bitch.

 

Maybe I am. But I’m not going to lie. I’m perfectly okay with that description. Before y’all get all riled up, I’m not gonna get all “let’s be empowered to call each other bitches” on you, because it’s not the point.

 

The point is that sometimes, people do things and don’t expect that I will call you on it.

Or I don’t react how you thought I was going to react.

Sometimes, I say what I REALLY MEAN, instead of what you thought I was going to say.

Occasionally, my opinion is not your opinion.

 

That’s not to say that I am the kind of person who will get ALL IN YOUR FACE with my opinions (but, this *is* my blog. This is one place where I am allowed to be as opinionated as I want). I’m not. Usually. I tend to take things comfortably in stride. Because THAT is really the kind of person I am. I’m not aggressive, unless I think that the occasion calls for it.

 

That being said. I’m not PASSIVE either. You don’t get to decide what I’m going to do or where I’m going to do it, unless

a) I don’t really have an opinion.

b) I am in the minority (majority rules when you go out in groups y’all.)

c) I wanted to that anyways.

d) You’re paying.

 

I am also not the person who is going to let people treat or talk to me any old kinda way. That goes from stranger on the street to the woman who gave birth to me (although, she’s got some privelege, yo. That’s my mama).

 

I like to think of myself as being somewhere in the middle between doormat and aggressively obnoxious asshole.

 

HOWEVER. If you act like a complete asshole, please do not be surprised if I respond in a manner befitting your completely obnoxious behavior.

 

And if that makes me a bitch to you? I guess you’ll just have to deal with it.

This is why I shouldn’t have friends

Posted on by B

So, the names/pictures were taken off to protect ummm… people who ARE  on the internet (because this is Facebook), but probably didn’t think they’d be on it like this.

 ANYWAYS. I didn’t even post the status update that started all this, because THAT IS NOT THE PART THAT MATTERS.

 The part that matters is:

  1. Keep your argument offline, lest I decide to post it for the world to see.
  2. Why are you instigating? EVERYONE on this thread is GROWN. And by grown, I mean at least 25 years old, and too old to be fanning the flames.
  3. I am not helpful. AT ALL. 
    There’s always one…

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