Ask me no questions

I have a firm policy on advice: I don’t give it, unless you ask for it.

I will sit quietly with my unpopular opinion because ain’t nobody ask me.

I don’t often point out people’s faults. Ok, well…maybe not to their faces. Because anybody who knows me knows I will send you stealthy pictures of random people and their absolutely horrifying fashion choices. But if you ask me “What is my problem?” And then I tell you, DON’T GET MAD AT ME.

YOU. ASKED.

*I* know what my faults are: I have general jackassy behavior, I’m stubborn, I can be lazy about things that I don’t really want to do to begin with…Wait. We’re not talking about me right now. We’re talking about you. *YOU* can’t see your faults, because to you they’re not faults. BUT TO EVERYONE ELSE, YOU DO THAT THING THAT GETS ON EVERYBODY’S NERVES. And while I deal with it because I love you, it is definitely a thing that is not winning you any personality contests.

If you ask, AND if I actually told you, you should consider than I told you because YOU NEEDED TO KNOW. Because DAMNIT that personality flaw is irritating as fuck, and maybe you needed somebody to point it out to you because CLEARLY you don’t (want) see it, BUT if you had to ask, then YOU KNOW THERE’S SOMETHING.

Which, you know…may be the reason I went ahead and was honest (in a nice way for a change, and not my usual brutal honesty which it generally way more painful than it needs to be <— see? another one of my character flaws), and told you in a way that wouldn’t completely destroy you, instead of fluffing your ego in that way that girls will do to their friends by telling you, “Girl, you know bitches be tripping.”

Because sometimes it ain’t the bitches that be tripping. IT’S YOU. And sometimes, somebody needs to tell you.

That’s REAL friendship. Keeping in real even when you don’t want to.

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